I Love My Cousin, Is It Wrong?
by Sasheenka
Summary: TohmaxSuguru. Takes place about one year after the anime. Warning: lemon.


Title: I Love My Cousin (Is it wrong?)

Author: Sasheenka

Pairing: Tohma/Suguru, mentions of Yuki/Shuichi and Hiro/Ayaka (Wow, I overcame my dislike of her)

Rating: R

Summary: First it's smut, than romance continued in some angst and drama ending in fluff.

Warnings: Incest and explicit Yaoi.

Disclaimer: I'd be grateful just for owning Tohma's hat, but alas Gravitation universe and its characters (along with their clothes) belong to Maki Murakami.

Beta - Kloudy Reignfall - thanks!

Prologue

He was lying on a bed with his eyes closed, picturing the body of the one he desired so much, how delicate is his skin, how soft and pliable are his lips. He almost felt it.

"Aah," A shallow moan escaped his lips, when he took his arousal into his hand.

It wasn't the first night he spent captured by his fantasies, but it was the first one he had a plan. Tomorrow he'd have an ideal opportunity - he had to use it.

Chapter One

It was Friday and although 10 P.M. had already passed, the building of N-G Productions was still crowded with people. The anniversary party of N-G, the biggest and most influential recording company in Japan, was halfway through. Only half of all the drinks were remaining and the food had nearly disappeared.

There were several tens of people; with a few exceptions employees and business partners, most of them were standing or sitting in groups, others were dancing or just observing. Among the last sort was Suguru Fujisaki, keyboardist for the highly successful J-Rock band Bad Luck. He wasn't much sociable and so many people gathered, all that noise and heat were beginning to be very uncomfortable. Well, he never minded it during the concerts, because he was onstage separated from the crowd and when he played he was totally absorbed in music. But now he was standing in a corner of a huge meeting room, which now served as a place for the party, and tried to look inconspicuous.

To make the best of the time he had to spend there he watched his secret love. But now the object of his fantasies disappeared and Suguru had no intentions in letting it be. He tried to find him (yes, as much as he hated to admit it, Suguru was gay) again with his gaze, but it was in vain. He was beginning to be annoyed and he was trying to find where could Tohma Seguchi – his sixteen years older cousin, his idol and rival in the music world and, as the almighty president of N-G Productions, his employer – got lost. Because as the arranger of this party he couldn't go away entirely.

'Is he meeting someone? For business? For a date?'

He didn't have enough time to take his thoughts farther, when he felt someone's hand on his back. He jerked with surprise and turned around. But before he could say anything he was silenced by a forefinger pressed to his lips. Tohma tilted his head closer to his ear and whispered: "Shush". He was still holding him around the waist with his other hand, but he was getting bolder, running his hand lower and lower until he got to the waistband of his pants. But of course it didn't stop him from creeping inside.

When he turned around and realized it was the one and only Seguchi Tohma, who was embracing him from behind, he didn't know if he should pull away, purr blissfully or try to act as if nothing was happening. In the end he tactically decided for the third option. But when he felt Seguchi's bare palm move over the intimate parts of his body he lost control, closed his eyes and softly moaned. Tohma smiled to himself – he'd hoped for this kind of response – and continued in teasing his little cousin. Suguru was trembling, unable to form any coherent thought.

"Seguchi-san..." he managed to breathe out shakily.

"Would you like more, Suguru?" whispered Tohma.

Fujisaki wasn't currently able to respond so he just nodded. Tohma pulled his fingers out from the younger boy's slacks and leaned to him again.

"Come in ten minutes to my office." He slightly touched his lips to his neck and elegantly made his way through the crowd.

Suguru after observing his idol disappear glanced at his watch and decided to have a glass of wine – as an encouragement. Tohma's invited him to his office promising something more and if Suguru was about to lose his innocence this night, he'd need lots of it. He didn't know what exactly to expect, he was nervous, but he trusted his cousin unconditionally and so he shifted his fears away from his mind.

He put the glass on the table and started to walk towards the door. Before he left he caught a glimpse of Seguchi's wife Mika and unfortunately she saw him too. She waved at him and before he could disappear she was by his side. Suguru tried in vain for his guilty feelings to go away – he had known Mika for a long time and he knew how she loved her husband. But he loved him too and just because of something like conscience he would not let this opportunity escape him. Tohma would be his, only his – this night for sure.

"Ah, Fujisaki-kun, have you seen Tohma? I need to speak with him, but I haven't seen him anywhere for at least ten minutes." She said and looked around the room, it was too crowded and the twilight was making it difficult to see.

Suguru took a deep breath and said, "I'm sorry, Mika-san, but I haven't got the slightest clue about where he is. Do you need something important?" He made the most innocent little face he could muster.

"I have a headache. I called for a taxi to take me home. I just wanted to tell him, but as I see, I won't have the chance to do so. If you see him, would you tell him, please?"

"Of course, Mika-san, you can rely on me." And this time he was being honest.

"Thank you, Suguru. Have fun," she said and walked away.

Suguru smiled. 'I'll certainly try,' he thought. Then he checked his watch again and quickly ran after her. He didn't head for the lifts, but instead he took the stairs. On the floor above he made his way through a long corridor on the right, which was ended in a dark massive door. Suguru stopped in front of them and tried to calm down. He was breathing deeply and his heart was beating three times faster than usual. And he was certain wasn't just from the run.

He knocked and waited.

"Come in," he heard almost immediately. Suguru shivered. Tohma's voice was gentle, but in the same moment emphatic. Suguru knew who the man he was dealing with was. Tohma was unpredictable. He could smile sweetly and without a blink of his deep turquoise eyes he could destroy whoever he wanted. There were three kinds of people around him. The first ones adored him from afar as a genius from the world-famous band Nittle Grasper; the others were either those who were deceived by the gentle, even feminine, air about him and his boyish smile or those who feared him. Suguru didn't belong in any of these groups, or maybe he partly took place in all of them. But he knew his cousin better than most, with the exception of Mika and perhaps her brother Eiri. He remembered the times when he was a child and Tohma spent a lot of time talking with him, or better say, Tohma talked and little Suguru didn't have much of a clue what his adored cousin was talking about, nevertheless he was there to listen. He always enjoyed the time they spend together. He felt safe and loved. The older he got the more he started to understand him, but in the same time they were growing apart. When Tohma became successful he had very little time for his family, and although they saw each other from time to time, it was not the same. It had been because of Tohma that Suguru started learning playing the keyboards; he wanted to be like the famous Tohma Seguchi. Never in these early days did he considerate being his rival one day.

But these were not the thoughts inside our little keyboardist's pretty head, when he took the doorknob in his hand and opened the door to Seguchi's office. He was thinking about what was awaiting him, about his dreams coming true. Those dreams that haunted him every single night – he dreamed about this, waking up in the middle of the night all sweaty and trembling and easing the pressure in his groin with his hand.

Tonight was going to be different.

Tohma was leaning against his wooden table, with one hand resting on the desk, the other on his hip. He was wearing dark violet silk shirt and tight black pants. The jacket he wore for the party was now thrown over the leather armchair behind the table.

"Lock the door and come closer," he instructed him quietly. Suguru turned the key in the lock and with few steps he made it to his cousin. He stopped in front of him, awaiting his reaction. Tohma didn't hesitate and with his left hand he embraced his waist and pulled him closer. Suguru put his hands around Tohma's neck and sighed blissfully. Tohma lifted his face handily and closed the distance between their lips. Suguru was pliable, immediately parting his lips to deepen the kiss. Tohma buried his hand in the dark-green hair of the younger boy and relished the feeling of the velvety softness of his mouth. Suguru moaned and let his hands slide to his lover's chest. Then he began undoing the buttons on his shirt, his hands were shaking but he didn't stop. Without breaking the kiss they managed to take off both of their shirts. Then Tohma shifted his mouth to Suguru's neck, kissed his collarbone and slowly moved lower until he found one small, pink nipple. He took the soft flesh between his lips and ran his smooth tongue along it.

"Ahh, Seguchi-san...aahahh." Suguru gasped for breath. Tohma was delighted when he discovered his young cousin counts between the men, whose nipples are very sensitive, and so he gave the same ministrations to its twin. Then he went down on his knees, his lips never leaving the sensual body of his lover. His fingers skillfully undid the button and the zipper on the dark-haired boy's pants and pulled them down in one swift motion. The only thing hiding the object of Seguchi's interest was a pair of navy blue boxers. And so it had to go away. Suguru shivered, when Tohma moved his delicate fingers around his inner thighs and even more when he replaced them with his lips. Tohma was making it agonizingly slow, savoring every tiny moment, he knew he was driving his cousin mad. Suguru buried his fingers in his hair trying to maneuver him to his erected shaft. Tohma smiled slightly and finally turned his attention where Suguru wanted it the most.

Suguru Fujisaki was at the height of bliss. He had never felt anything even close to this in all of his seventeen years. All those incredible sensations coursing through his body were new to him and the sight of Seguchi Tohma kneeling in front of him and – Suguru didn't know if something like fate existed, but he was thankful to it. The world became blurred and the only things he was able to perceive were unbelievable touches of the blond man's mouth and tongue. But then Tohma pulled away and Suguru mumbled something in protest. Whatever he wanted to say was cut short as Seguchi, who was standing again, silenced him with a kiss. Suguru felt through the trousers, which Tohma was still wearing, that his companion was just as aroused as he was.

Tohma shifted his lips to his ear and in a barely audible whisper he said: "It's time to stop playing, Suguru."

His hot breath tickled Suguru's sensitive skin and he shivered – both from the sensation and from his words.

He withdrew from the embrace and slid his hands down to his belt. Suguru held his breath. Tohma unbuckled, unbuttoned and unzipped his trousers and finally stepped out of them. Suguru noticed with surprise and delight that the other keyboardist was wearing no underwear. He reached for him with his hand and let his palm move across his chest to his hip.

"So beautiful..." Suguru uttered so silently it was almost impossible to hear.

Tohma pulled him closer again and lunged for a kiss. Both of them moaned this time when their naked erections touched and there was no space separating their bodies.

"Sit down on the sofa," He instructed him. Suguru did as he was told and waited. Tohma walked around his table and took something from one of the drawers. Despite that Suguru didn't see clearly what it was he immediately presumed it. 'So he's prepared for this!' flashed through his mind. He tried to get rid of his nervousness. He knew what was to come and he was telling himself that there was nothing to fear. Lots of people do it. From among those he knew at least Shindo Shuichi did.

Tohma walked to the couch and sat beside him. Suguru glanced up to him with his beautiful shadowy eyes and stuttered shyly, "H-have you ever...?"

"Yes." Tohma said it with a voice eliminating any further questions.

"Uhm, Seguchi-san, I've never...with a-anyone." That was all Suguru managed to say, blushing deep red. He felt like a little boy in front of his cousin.

"Anyone?" Tohma smiled slightly.

Suguru shook his head.

"There's no need to be scared. I would never hurt you," he said gently and caressed his face. The boy nodded and closed his eyes for a second. When he opened them again he saw Tohma picking up a tube of lube, as Suguru guessed earlier. He squeezed part of the translucent contents on his fingers and spread it over his penis. He positioned his cousin so that Suguru was lying with his head reclined on the armrest; one leg bent and the other left loosely hanging from the couch. Tohma leaned to him and, placing sappy kisses on his brow, nose, cheeks, his chin and finally taking his lips, he began to explore those untouched places of his lover.

"Ahh...Se-Seguchi-saaahhh," groaned Suguru, when Tohma pushed one of his fingers inside him. It was a feeling he'd never experienced before, pleasure mixed with pain. At first Suguru tensed, but as soon as Tohma touched that secret spot hidden inside of every man, he was smashed by euphoric waves. He threw his head back and embraced his cousin around his neck. The blond proceeded with adding second and then third finger, trying to properly prepare his young virginal lover. When he thought it was enough, he pulled them out. Suguru let his arms fall and looked at Tohma questioningly. Tohma smiled his cute boyish smile and outstretched his hand.

"Come to me."

Suguru raised himself and took the offered hand in his. Tohma maneuvered him so that now Suguru was straddling him. Then he lifted him, touching the entrance to his body with the head of his shaft.

"Ready, Suguru?" Tohma stroked the face of the younger boy with his fingertips and smiled at him again. Suguru smiled in return, if maybe a bit hesitantly, which nevertheless Tohma took as a sign of consent. And then their bodies joined in one. Suguru wanted to scream, but the actual scream stuck in his throat. He felt he had to explode any minute, because this impossibly intense feeling was unbearable. It was something absolutely amazing, a total fulfillment. He began to lift himself up with every move of Seguchi's hips; he lowered his head, buried his small palms into his cousin's fair locks and touched their lips together. Tohma held his lover with one hand and caressed his back with the other.

"Aahh...To-Tohma....ahh...I won't holdaahhh..." Suguru broke the kiss throwing his head backwards. With every other move of their hips a loud moan escaped him. He was now very close to his first orgasm, which wouldn't be self-induced. The pain he felt in the beginning was completely gone and the only thing he was currently feeling was pure ecstasy.

"Suguru," whispered Tohma, he felt the muscles contracting in the dark-haired boy's body. He pulled him closer and hugged him tightly around his waist.

"Aaahh...TOHMA!!!"

"Aaaahh!"

They climaxed together, linked in close embrace.

Seguchi rested his head on his cousin's shoulder; they stayed like that for a while just relishing the afterglow of a powerful orgasm. Suguru lifted himself from his lover's lap and slid on the couch next to Tohma. It was weird, but now he felt somewhat empty. Tohma reached out for a pack of hankies on the table and cleaned the mess from their bodies.

"We should get dressed."

Suguru nodded, but he was reluctant to do so, because he felt so nice and warm, comfortably buried in a leather sofa next to the man he loved and with whom he's just had the most incredible sex you could imagine. Despite that he raised himself and began to gather his scattered clothes from the floor.

Tohma started buttoning up his silky shirt when he heard Suguru, who had just put his pants on, sobbing quietly.

"Do you regret it, Suguru?"

"No! That's not it!" He vehemently cast up his eyes. Big chocolate brown orbs glittering and pink cheeks gleamy with silver tears.

"Then why?" Tohma touched the tips of his fingers to his face and wiped off those salty streams trickling down his cheeks. Then he gently took his chin between his thumb and forefinger and made the younger musician look him in the eyes. Suguru glanced up to him, but he was not able to hold his intense gaze.

"I...when I was coming here I told myself that it's going to be enough...I mean just tonight. It'll be just sex; I'll get along without feelings just fine. But I...can't. I..."Suguru bowed his head. He was trying hard to suppress his sobs.

"You love me?" Tohma's voice was soft, when he asked. Suguru couldn't help but smile and look up at him again.

"Yes."

"But that's not a reason to cry, Suguru-chan. Or do you think I would make love with you without any affection at all?" Suguru's smile widened when he heard the pet name Tohma used for him. His eyes twinkled and his heart was beating even faster than when he entered.

"I, I...so you...really?"

"Really. But now we better go back. You'll go ahead so it won't be suspicious, ok?" said Tohma, when he hooked up the last button on his dark shirt. He leaned to the younger boy and gave him a long, deep kiss.

Suguru finished dressing and started to leave, when he remembered something.

"I almost forgot! I met Mika-san, she wanted to let you know that she had a headache, took a taxi and went home."

Tohma smiled and caressed Fujisaki's cheek.

"In that case I can drive you home."

"That doesn't sound so bad," grinned Suguru. He felt like the happiest person in the entire Tokyo, as he walked out the door of Seguchi Tohma's office, imagining the life awaiting him.

TBC


End file.
